This Love of Mine (Raine Series #1) Read online

  This Love of Mine

  By

  Amanda Bennett

  Copyright © 2013 By Amanda Bennett

  All rights reserved. Printed in the United States

  No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any form or by any means electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval systems, without prior written permission of the author except where permitted by law.

  The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

  Cover art by Robin Harper/ Wicked By Design

  Check out other books by Amanda Bennett

  Time To Let Go

  Beautifully Broken (The Broken Series #1)

  Breaking Beautiful (The Broken Series #2)

  Misguided Heart

  Coming Soon

  This Trust of Mine (Raine Series #2) MAY 1013

  This Heart of Mine (Raine Series #3) JUNE 2013

  Unbreakable Hearts (The Broken Series #3 novella) JUNE 2013

  Faithless AUGUST 2013

  (All dates are subject to change)

  You can find Author Amanda Bennett at the following:

  www.authoramandabennett.com

  www.facebook.com/authoramandabennett

  www.twitter.com/spoiledbrat81

  www.goodreads.com/author/show/6550967.Amanda_Bennett

  A huge thanks to everyone who constantly supports me and reads my books. You all are amazing beyond belief.

  A special thanks to:

  Jenn Foor (Author)

  Thank you for spreading the word about my books and helping me find awesome beta readers.

  Robin Harper (Cover Artist)

  You are an amazing person and cover artist and I have decided I am keeping you..LOL

  Thank you to all of my new friends on Facebook, Twitter and Goodreads y'all are amazing, wonderful people.

  Thank you to all the book bloggers that have helped spread the word for all of my books and that have taken the time to read and review my work. I seriously couldn't have asked for better people in my life:

  Denise & Nic w/ Flirty and Dirty Book Blog, Books Books Books, Into The Night Reviews, I Heart Books, The Book Hookers, Totally Booked, Book Crush, Sugar and Spice Reviews, First Class Books, Cynthia Shepp Book Reviews, and The Little Black Book Blog, just to name a few

  To my #1 fan and amazing new blogger Tamsyn Bester (The Secret Book Brat) You are an amazing person and I am proud to call you my friend.

  A HUGE thanks to my beta readers and amazing new friends. I could not have finished this book without y'all:

  Cami Holt-Krystyniak (editor), Jennifer LaFon, Ena Burnette, Mechelle Lovell-Jackson, & Tosha Powers

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Epilogue

  Prologue

  I think deep down I may have always known, but part of me still questioned his motives. I had always been a popular girl, but I had a real knack for finding trouble; no matter what form that trouble came in. Lucky for me, this time it showed up as a hot tattooed cowboy in the middle of nowhere Texas. I knew better, lord knows I knew what pretty packages like his came with, but I couldn't help but want to know more about him. Momma always said a boy would be my downfall, I just didn't know to what extent. I tried my damndest to stay away from him, but with those looks, and those eyes. Oh those sparkling emerald green eyes. Yep, I was a goner from day one. Nothing could've stopped me from getting to know Madison Raine, baseball player/cowboy, absolutely nothing.

  Chapter 1

  Kayla

  "Kayla Anne James, you get your sorry ass down here right this instant."

  I rolled my eyes knowing damn good and well I was in for it again. "Coming Momma." I quickly tugged my Aerosmith shirt over my head, and buttoned up my jeans. I double checked my makeup and tied my shoes, before I went flying down the stairs. If her tone of voice was any indication as to how much trouble I was in, then I wasn't about to make her wait any longer than absolutely necessary.

  As soon as my converse covered feet hit the last step, I felt her hand connecting with my cheek. My hand instinctively went straight to my now burning skin, and fell into defensive mode.

  "Momma, what the hell?" Before I could get the last word out of my mouth, her hand was reared back and ready to let loose. I knew all too well, that fighting back wouldn't help, so I let her unleash her wrath upon me.

  "How dare you embarrass me like this! You and that no good, drug-dealing asshole have pushed me too far this time. I found these in your room, you little slut!"

  I felt the bag of weed and strip of condoms push against my heaving chest. Part of me was pissed off that she had the audacity to go through my things, but another part of me was glad. This just meant I would be gone sooner rather than later.

  Every summer for the past five years, my mother has been shipping me off to my grandparent's farm in Texas. I used to despise her for doing it at first, but slowly came to feel more at home with them, than at my own home with my mother. My mom was your typical country club wife, except for the wife part.

  Right after my fifth birthday, my father decided to leave. He never told me his motives or reasoning for leaving us, he just reassured me that it was not my fault and that he'd be back for me. That was twelve years ago, almost to the day.

  Despite the fact that my father was no longer around, I was still a daddy's girl through and through. Ever since he left, I made it my goal in life to earn enough money to get back to him. After my fifth birthday, my father hadn't called for almost a year. I willed him too, on a daily basis, but no matter how many times a day I prayed or wished for him to come back or call, it never happened. Momma had been amazing the first year. She took me to and from school, took me to do fun things afterwards, and treated me like the princess I was. My mother never blamed me for my father leaving, and she always reassured me that no matter what happened, she would always be here for me.

  Exactly three days after my sixth birthday, I got the first phone call from Cliff, aka my father. I was bouncing up and down and couldn't hold still throughout the entire conversation. I told him how much I had missed him. I asked at least a million questions and didn't give him more than a second to respond to any of them. Momma finally took the phone from me and listened for the answers that I was too impatient to wait to hear.

  She quickly handed the phone back to me and within seconds, her demeanor had completely changed. My father explained to me that he wasn't coming back home, but he would be calling me every Wednesday to "catch up," whatever that meant. The only details I had remembered from that conversation, was that he was currently living in London with his new wife who was pregnant with their first baby, and when he could, he would come back for me and we would be a family again. This made Momma mad. She never outright told me that it did, but I could tell that she would have hit him, had he been standing in front of her.

  When I turned twelve, I think I fina
lly came to the realization that he was never coming back, and if I ever wanted to see him again, I would have to find my own way to him. I hated that my own father couldn't even make the effort to come see me or even call me. Our conversations quickly went from once a week, to about once a month, if that. I understood, but in a way I felt as though I wasn't a good enough daughter to have around, now that he had his "new" family.

  The day I turned sixteen was one of the best and worst days. The morning of my party was amazing. Momma wasn't drunk, which was a shock and she actually had taken the time to go and get me a gift. This was a feat all in itself seeing as she was rarely sober enough to drive. When I opened the box containing my new Chanel purse, I screamed out in joy. I ran straight to my momma's arms and squeezed her as tight as possible. And for the first time, in almost ten years, she reciprocated my affections with a smile. It ended up being one of the best days of my life. But as they say, you have to take the good with the bad. There was nothing but bad that followed.

  As the years passed, Momma's grip on me became suffocating. She started dating a new guy six months before my party and he was about as upscale as you get. He was a defense attorney for the state of Arizona and she never let me, or anyone else forget it. They were your typical high power couple, minus the fact that Momma didn't work anymore. She was what my friends and I like to call a "country club rat." She spent everyday at that damn country club, drinking and who knows what else. I tried to stay as far away from her business, unlike her, who had to be all in mine.

  My junior year in high school started out well, but was easily tarnished once my momma got wind of who I had decided to keep company with. I met Wren through one of my best friends when I was fourteen, but hadn't seen or run into him again until he started going to school with us this year.

  My entire world flipped upside down and inside out when Wren and I started hanging out. I went from being an over achieving, good girl, to chew 'em up and spit 'em out bad girl within months. The worst thing I had ever done before meeting him, was smoke a cigarette. Now I was finding myself doing drugs, sneaking out to raves and being the getaway driver for his small thefts. I knew what I was doing was wrong and I even threatened to leave Wren if he didn't calm his shit down, but he never would have let me leave anyway. This was my life now, and I just had to make it work until I turned eighteen and could leave.

  Momma hadn't noticed my reckless behavior at first. She was usually too wrapped up in Richard, the attorney. They had been together for some time now, but I knew deep down that Richard had no intentions of marrying my mother. I don't know why I say that, but I just felt like Richard wasn't exactly genuine. He was always unbelievably nice to me. He'd always buy me things and even take my side in many of Momma's and my arguments, which only made matters worse, but he deserved more than my mother. She was beautiful, don't get me wrong, but she was an alcoholic and honestly why would a successful attorney want to be with an alcoholic, who let the whole world know all of her shit?

  Chapter 2

  Madison

  "Son, just get the work done. I only have ya here for two more days, and I need it done."

  I heard my grandfather's voice trail off, as I made my way out towards the empty field that separated my grandfather's land from the James' land. I knew I had a lot of work left to do, but I was fucking dragging ass today. My best friend Glenn, from my hometown, was visiting his grandparents also, so he had come to visit late last night to hang, but we ended up drinking a fifth of Jack, and now I was feeling it.

  When I finished dragging my sorry ass up the small hill to where the lands connected, I all but threw myself onto the ground. Who would've thought that turning eighteen would be so fucking hard. I groaned as I searched my jean pockets for my pack of smokes and lighter. As the orange flame met with the thin paper, I sucked in the biggest drag of smoke my lungs would allow. I let it out with a loud sigh and instantly felt better. I shaded my face from the burning sun with my baseball cap before taking another long drag from the burning cigarette in my hand.

  I had been coming to my grandparent's farm since I was twelve to help out. My father and I used to come up here almost every other weekend when I was younger, but since he landed himself in jail for a robbery three years ago, I had been on my own. My mother had passed away when I was four from cancer and I could barely remember her anymore. It was sad and I wished everyday that the picture of her in my mind, would stop fading, but it was almost gone. I missed her terribly, but I had been the man of the house for far too long to even think twice about needing a mom around.

  I put the butt of the cigarette up to my lips one last time, sucking in the nicotine that I so craved. I put the rest out on the grass next to me, before crossing my arms and closing my eyes. I knew I had to get to feeding the horses, but I just wanted a second to myself for once. I loved coming to the farm in the summer, but man my grandfather was constantly on my ass day in and day out. It got tiring and old, real fast.

  All I could think about lately was going home. Our house was only about six hours away from my grandparent's farm, but it was far enough that I didn't have to deal with any parental units, except for the old lady next door to us, who promised to keep an eye on me while my dad was gone.

  When dad was put away, I was supposed to be sent to live with my grandparents, but I made sure to make a big scene about not wanting to leave school or my friends. In the end, my grandfather agreed to let me stay in our house as long as old lady Rickles checked on me everyday, and that my grandparents could pop in anytime they wanted. I was desperate and needed to stay close to everything I knew, so I stupidly agreed.

  At seventy-six years old, my grandfather made it a point to drive the six hours from Abernathy, Texas to our small little town, to check on me at least once a week. I honestly never thought that he would spend so much time checking on me, but it was nice to know that someone cared enough to do it.

  My dad had been a great dad, when he remembered that he had a kid. He was a bit of a gambler and a good one at that, but his luck eventually ran out and so did the money, hence the robbery. Him and his buddy left late one night after he had thought I was asleep and never came home. I woke up to the phone ringing and an officer saying that my father was in jail and wouldn't be getting out for quite sometime. That was the night I went from a teenage boy, to an adult. I had no choice.

  Part of my agreement with my grandparents, was that every summer I was to put all my other obligations aside and come help out on the farm. I agreed, mainly because they deserved my help. After everything that had happened to our family, it was the least I could do and it got me away from everything for three whole months. Out here I could ignore the entire world for that time and when I finally returned, everything had basically remained the same. I reached for another cigarette when I heard a loud thundering sound, shaking the ground. I quickly shot up, scrambling for my hat, when I saw the fifteen horses from our property come barreling at me.

  SHIT!!

  I quickly got to my feet and clasped down on the mane of Rocket just as he came rushing past. Of course the horses didn't have saddles, so I had to tighten my grip with my thighs and hold on for dear life to his mane. I tried multiple times to slow Rocket down, but something had spooked the whole lot of them and they were running for the hills, literally. After about half a mile, they all started to slow. I reached around Rocket's neck, patting him just below his head and he eventually came to a full stop. Once Rocket stopped, the entire heard stopped and began grazing the hay bails randomly placed throughout the land we owned.

  After I caught my breath, I turned to count just how many of them had made it out this far. As my count reached fifteen, I suddenly remembered what my grandfather had asked me to do. "Shit, I forgot to fix the latch on the gate. Son of a bitch!" I shouted to myself thinking no one was around.

  "You're darn right you forgot." My grandfather's voice traveled through the thick humid air, and I silently wished I were anywhere but here.


  "I'm so sorry, sir. I swear I was just about to go do it." I was lying and I was pretty sure he knew it.

  "Don't you dare sit there and lie to me boy. Your lucky I don't hop down off this horse and give your ass a good whoopin. Now pick up your darn cigarette butts and get your ass back to that house and help out your grandma. Obviously you can't be trusted to take care of something so small as a latch. Now get!" He roared.

  I tugged on Rocket's mane and clicked his backside with my heal. We took off in the direction of my mess and after gathering the one cigarette butt off of the ground, we made our way back towards the house. I knew I was in some serious trouble now. Damn it!

  Chapter 3

  Kayla

  "You are out of here first thing tomorrow, do you hear me?" My mother's voice was like nails on a chalkboard.

  "Yes, ma'am." I was silently jumping for joy, knowing I would be free of her in less than twenty-four hours.

  "Go flush that shit down the toilet before Richard gets here. I swear you're about as stupid as they come."

  I grabbed the small baggie of weed off of the floor where it had fallen, and walked straight to the downstairs bathroom. I had no qualms with flushing the drugs, seeing as they weren't even mine. Trust me, I had done my fair share of drugs over the years, but I had quit practically everything cold turkey about six months ago. Of course my momma wouldn't know that because she was barely even awake, let alone present throughout the day.

  Just as I flushed the toilet, I heard the front door open. I knew it was Richard for my momma, but knowing that us being nice to one another really pissed her off, and the fact that I was leaving first thing in the morning, I decided to push her buttons. I came around the corner, baggie in hand and saw Richard walking towards me.

  "Hey Richard, looking good. How has your day been?" I was all smiles and I could feel the anger radiating off of my mother. She never showed her true colors in front of Richard, and I used this to my advantage, knowing I would pay for it later.